I’m looking at the profiles that read: “Don’t even think about swiping right if you are under 6 ft and don’t make at least six figures. I want someone who will treat me like a princess, meaning flowers every other day, make me dinner when I’m tired, can afford shoes with red bottoms (you know the one) and will put me first above all else.”

I commend any and all of you who have standards and convictions you are passionate about when it comes to establishing a relationship. You most definitely should. But let’s take a moment to break this how to message someone on hitch down. You’ve never met these people and, similarly, they have no idea who you are.

These dudes aren’t going to relentlessly vie for your love and social media endorsements like faceless cogs

Most dating app users are just seeking an initial attraction, and then will probably immediately ask you out for a drink without much lead-in. Despite the rush of it all, I would still encourage you all to hold off on the demands. Allow your personality to shine through and not to get overpowered by your manufactured idea of perfection.

Save your monochromatic color scheme and naturally unnatural beach aesthetic for Instagram. In most cases, you can connect other social media to your profile, so remember, your matches have probably scoured your other accounts. There is no need to maintain the same level of posed perfection.

Consider showing off your personality in pictures you wouldn’t usually use as a profile pic on other platforms. I recommend something fun and real. Something you’d share with your friends.

I love seeing my friends explore their sexy style, whether with an over-the-shoulder smolder, or dress with a leg peeking through the slit. I think showing off your body confidence in your profile is an awesome way to feel comfortable in a sometimes uncomfortable situation.

As for pictures to avoid, I don’t have much advice here. I support any image women feel beautiful in. I would caution against too many snapchat filters and mirror selfies with a blocked face from the phone’s positioning. This is not for the man’s benefit, but for yours. Sometimes we feel a false intimacy with ourselves and hiding in our pictures can emotionally force us to disassociate from our own realities.

Don’t hide, you’re beautiful just the way you are and any man worth talking to will feel the same way!

4. Be cautious about over-committing to long-term messaging, especially before you meet someone.

Meeting someone for the first time can be terrifying. We have no idea how the chemistry will be, what their voice sounds like, how to leave and when, and overall, the entire experience is nerve-wracking. But do you know what is even worse than getting the awkward first meet up out of the way? Overdoing the text messages.

I’ve said this term a lot, and I’ll say it again, dating apps perpetuate a false intimacy, and the message feature is no exception.

Text messages are easy and don’t require a lot of energy. So, it’s easy to fall into the pit of texting from morning until night. When people text, they typically want to show off parts of themselves they feel are most alluring.

We detail our habits and quirks, and through a screen, we jump ahead and catalog parts of us that a partner would usually discover through time naturally and surprisingly. But instead, when you come face to face with the person you’ve shared such personal details with, it feels like you are meeting up with a stranger who has a lot of collateral on you.